Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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