Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize