And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize