Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
