Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
