Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
