there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
