Dude my mom stole all your condoms
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
