You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
