I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Randomize
