I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
