you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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