pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Randomize
