She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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