I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Randomize
