dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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