As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
