We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
and you fell through a lawn chair
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
