I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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