dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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