Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
