You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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