Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Randomize