He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
