Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
