I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
honey bunches of taint.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Randomize
