even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
