My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
