i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
