she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
If I die, sorry about rent.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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