hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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