I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
