Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
