yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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