driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
