none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
So much Jack, so little girl.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
