it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
