we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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