Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Randomize
