I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
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