i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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