The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
do nipples grow back?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
