If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
She bit a glass in half.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
