i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
