Dual....:-)
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
