i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
