Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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