Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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