3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
