lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
